So J and I are celebrating our 17th “Us” Anniversary on 2/5…where has the time gone? I’m still crazy (in more than one sense ha ha) for him after all this time. He’s that rare type of guy who takes his marriage vows seriously and doesn’t run when the going gets tough, because if that was the case he would’ve left a long time ago I’m sure.
We met initially when I was a freshman at the local community college studying music and he was a senior in high school. I went to a meeting at the CYO Center with my friend M and apparently she was a mutual friend. He was one of the few who approached me and held my hand during one of the discussions we were all having. It felt comfortable and right but I didn’t realize then I was holding the hand of the man who would be my husband. Something just felt so right about it. I remember asking him if he’d like to join us for dinner after and he politely declined stating it was a school night for him and didn’t want to be in trouble with his folks. I kept thinking of him while we were out at Newport Creamery after.
I didn’t go back to CYO for a while after that just due to timing but every now and again would think of him. I guess I liked him! I saw our mutual friend M while my friend A and I were out shopping at Victoria’s Secret and we were all discussing Valentine’s Day. I told M I didn’t have a date and was looking for someone to go to a piano concert with as well (yes I was and still am a total music geek!) and stated how lonely I was since I hadn’t dated anyone seriously. She told me about her friend J and that he was single and would pass my email on to him (this was a time before cell phones kids) and try to set us up! I remember telling her I thought I knew him somehow!
At the time I was working on a supermarket as a cashier and had some weird creeper guy who would always come to my register and follow me around the store. I get this email a day or 2 later from a user name called “Watcher” and thought somehow this weird creep had gotten my email so I just deleted it! I called my friend and was upset I hadn’t heard from J yet and was a little frustrated so I got his email address from her. I sent him a message and introduced myself and said I hadn’t heard from him. He emailed me back and I noticed the subject line from “Watcher” was the one I had originally sent him!! I emailed him back and explained the situation and how I deleted his emails. Luckily he was understanding!!!
A few weeks by and we talked a lot via email. Not owning a computer at the time made it tough but I’d stay at the computer lab at school just to be able to hear from him. He told me he was heading a retreat at the CYO center on 2/5 and asked if I’d like to be on the team to help him out as well as our friend M. I agreed to meet him and I remember he even sent me a poem before we met about how he was thinking about me all the time and had hoped I felt the same <3.
I was in the foyer of the CYO Center and telling M about the Rocky Horror Picture Show and dancing and singing when he walked in and saw me for the first time. Glad I still hadn’t scared him away!! We teamed the retreat and kept hanging more and more together as the evening progressed.
After the retreat we went out to Bickfords for dinner with M. She was calling her boyfriend who lived in another state at the time and upset he couldn’t be with us. J came over and sat next to me and put his arm around me and said “I’ve wanted to do this all night.” I was enjoying the time with him when M came back upset and told J to take me home and left. We hung around a little longer and headed out to the parking lot. Out by his car I was talking with him because I was nervous about a relationship and had my heart broken about 7-8 months before. J asked to be his girlfriend and wiped my tears away as I said I was afraid of being left and hurt again. I told him I’d like to be his girlfriend and he leaned over and kissed me, I found out after that I was his first kiss. And I know I’ll be his last kiss.
17 years, a few cats, a few places to live, an elopement and lunch at the Mew’s Tavern and many happy memories. There are days where we annoy the living hell out of each other but when it comes down to it, I can’t spend my life with anyone else. Happy (almost) 17 years J. I love you with every piece of my mostly functional heart and my crazy soul.